bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
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