Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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