I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
