Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Your cock deserves a montage
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Randomize
