Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Randomize
