I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Randomize
