I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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