Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
