there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize