wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
we're so committed to being not committed
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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