just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Randomize
