She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I need moral support for this bender
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
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