Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
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