maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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