they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
