office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
