i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
