I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
