i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
this is an emotional support booty call
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
