the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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