hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
