Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Randomize
