i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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