best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
