her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
