Jerry, you need to find god
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
the gays at disneyland are vicious
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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