and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Randomize
