And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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