remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
