i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
