Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
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