the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
