then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize