Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
