I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
It's never too late to be topless.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Randomize
