I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
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