Dude! wtf happend last nite? I woke up with 2 black eyes and a head ache
You stepped off the curb and face planted the road...twice
Why didnt you hold me up....and why a second time?
I helped you up but figured it was wayy funnier to watch you fall again then lose my buzz....
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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