We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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