Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Randomize
