Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
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