So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Also, beer. Big fan.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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