OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize