why didn't you poke me back
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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