turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Randomize