He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
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