are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Just cropdusted the office
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Holy sore nipples Batman
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Randomize
