we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Randomize
