Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I just want to make out with him forever
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
