Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
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