He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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