wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
